Wednesday, April 27, 2005

'christian racists are stupid' shocker

Oh Christians, again. Are they having a laugh or what? Telling the real stuff from the spoof is never easy.

The wondrous Green Fairy blog directed me to the Kingdom Identity Ministries site where they sell a number of curious items.

'Our Speak Softly Spanking Stick teaches children good old-fashioned discipline. Each 16" x 1 1/2" stick is imprinted with Scripture verses.'



Riiiiiiiight. Your child may well be able to read through its arse cheeks, so spank that bible in.

They also sell two items that, taken together, are as nuts as it gets. Stickers discouraging white women from being 'race-mixing sluts'



and a wallchart detailing the heritage of the Anglo-Saxon race.



Why is it so many white supremacists go on about the good pure Anglo-Saxon race? Do these people not understand the function of a hyphen?

That group is a hybrid of Angles (from what's now Denmark) and Saxons (from Saxony, in what's now eastern Germany). It is, by definition, a mixed race.

They got together in what's now England about 1500 years ago. Even if you ignore the oxymoron in the idea of a hybridised group being 'pure', how does anyone claim pure Anglo-Saxon heritage? Who knows if they've had interbreeding with Vikings, Normans, Jews, Irish or any of the other groups who've been coming to this island in the intervening centuries, way before any of us can trace back our family tree.

Or indeed, any of the Roman, Celtic or other peoples who were already here before the Angles packed their cases and got busy with their oars. It's a bit weird to say the invaders of 1500 years ago are the true people of the island, but the ones from 1800 or 1200 years ago aren't.

Merrick, you're bemoaning the lack of sense and consistent logical thought among racist monotheists! Why not complain about the scarcity of unicorn-jockey pixies from Atlantis while you're at it?

Ooops, my bad.

In tribute to the source of this stuff, here's me dressed as a green fairy.



I think my 'dressing up as blogs I link to' thing should be a one-off rather than a theme though. Whilst Chase Me Ladies I'm In The Cavalry and Lost Bands of The New Wave Era would probably be fun, the first idea that comes to mind for Seven Inches of Joy would be over my risque-excess threshold, and what I'd suffer in depicting Kerosene Oyster Hell couldn't possibly be justified by the results.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Nice pic, you galloping nancy.



RA

transblue said...

Ha, fabulous picture darlin, it made me howl with laughter. Just can't think why we offend those poor oppressed Christians so!

Helen said...

I have just been filling out this 'If you were a book in Fahrenheit 451 which one would you be' etc. list which has been ricocheting about the blogs. The last question being 'who would you pass this stick to and why' I chose, for one, you, thus;
Bristling Badger - because the books he talks about on his blog all strike me as being of vital importance, and because he seems to be doing all he can to free himself and others from injustice, absurdity, violence and ugliness in this troubled world, and he opposes these things using positive actions. Mind you he may well think the whole list thing is a load of bullshit.

So, if you are not averse to such listing exercises, I hitherto invite you to undertake one. The questions can be found on my blog Take every day as it comes, brothers and sisters.
-Helen.

missbadger said...

fabulous outfit my dear, you have done green fairy proud - i would suggest getting yourself a badger outfit and you will be set(pun intended)

as for the mad christians, is it any wonder people refer to them as 'mad christians' when they spout such inane drivel?

hail satan!

Jim Bliss said...

I've still got a copy of that photo Merrick... Maybe I could start a series on my blog; "people I link to dressed as members of mid-80s Scottish bands"...?

merrick said...

RA
thankyou very much, glad that such an elite connoisseur of galloping nancydom as yourself is impressed.

transblue
As if the christians could object to fancy cross dressing when their priests spend all day running round in massive frocks! Well, when they do their one day a week of work anyway, lazy fuckers.

Pirate Drone
I've responded with a post doing the questionaire, but let me thankyou for you kind words. I'm genuinely humbled and touched.

missbadger
Yep, a badger outfit'd be good. And if it were a girl badger I could be continuing the 'dressing as who I link to' thing. Oh god, I'm gonna end up doing the Kerosene Oyster Hell...

Jim Bliss
Hmm, how about 'people you link to visually heckling 80s Scottish bands'?

I've got a picture of me at Simple Minds in Glastonbury holding a banner saying 'WHY DON'T YOU JUST FUCK OFF?'

That's much better, I'm sure you'll agree. Or even if you don't I do.

Play nicely or I'll tell your mum where to find your blog.

Better than you that's for sure said...

What the fuck do you know about Anglo-Saxon history? Nothing much by the looks of it, seeing how you manage to spout such inane drivel about it yourself. Yes they were a mixture of Germanic tribes, but none of them were black or Asian - Or even worse, Celts. And has it ever occured to you that those Celts who were here before we English may have also replaced people before them? We English are the only ones to have made this great country a world power. We gave the world our language, the most widely spoken on earth. Don't see much Welsh being spoken - not even in Wales.

Oh yes, and try reading a history book once in a while you idiotic waste of space!

Oh and by the way, St. Partick wasn't Irish either, so try telling that to the Irish Nationalists. It tends to shut them up. St. Edmund was the real Patron saint of England. don't suppose you knew that though.

Drop dead and die you left wing piece of shit. Or better still, drive into one of your Asian or black ghettos and spout drivel about their heritage and culture. No? Didn't think so. Typical left wing hypocritical coward.

And that goes for the rest of you fucking idiots too.

merrick said...

OK, Better than you that's for sure, since you've volunteered to be a barrel-enclosed piscine lifeform and handed me firearms, let's go.

What the fuck do you know about Anglo-Saxon history? Nothing much by the looks of it, seeing how you manage to spout such inane drivel about it yourself.

Mm-hmm. Like what drivel?

Yes they were a mixture of Germanic tribes, but none of them were black or Asian - Or even worse, Celts.

Oh my mistake. Wait a minute, no it isn't. I didn't actually say anything like that.

Can you say 'straw man'?

And has it ever occured to you that those Celts who were here before we English may have also replaced people before them?

You know the bit where I say 'Celtic or other peoples who were already here before the Angles'? What do you think I was getting at there?

We English are the only ones to have made this great country a world power. We gave the world our language,

Interesting choice of the verb 'to give'. My dictionary is the Oxford Concise. In their efforts to achieve concision they've omitted the meanings to do with imperialism and genocide.

Oh and by the way, St. Partick wasn't Irish either

Again, I stand corrected. Oh, no, again I don't, you nobshiner. Where on earth do I claim this or anything like it?

St. Edmund was the real Patron saint of England. don't suppose you knew that though

Pardon me, but I've a few questions:

1 - where does anyone have a list of 'real' patron saints?

2 - By what criteria does a saint make it on to that list?

3 - What the fuck does the nationality of a patron saint have to do with anything? Even if they did actually exist which many - our old pal George included - probably didn't?

4 - What the fuck do patron saints - of whatever nationality - have to do with anything anyway?

A fixation on saints smacks of Christianity. Surely that's a vile incomer religion from the middle east that we robust red-blooded anglo-saxon types should be repelling along with those other nasty immigrants. Except the ones from Denmark and East Germany that we claim lineage from. Even though none of us can show 1,500 years of family tree to prove it.

If you're English then you're an ethnic mongrel. If you really can trace family on this land going back 1500 years - which, by the way, you can't - then your family will have interbred with all kinds of other residents. You're part Angle, part Saxon, part Celt, part Jew, part Norman, part Irish and a whole load of others too. You are, in fact, multiculturalism embodied.

So do me and the rest of the world a favour; if inter-ethnic breeding or multiculturalism offend you, do us a favour and diminish it by throwing yourself under a fucking truck.