Wednesday, December 06, 2006

the answer to golf is blowing in the wind

So, Hugo Chavez is re-elected with about two thirds of the vote.

It'd be interesting to make a chart putting all the world leaders in order of what percentage of the electorate voted for them. See how the bringers of democracy (by force if necessary ya camel-jockey bastards) have such a piddling madate. Yet when someone like Chavez or Hamas get a two-thirds landslide, they're ostracised and undermined.

As the barking Bard of Barking said, you can fight for democracy at home and not in some foreign land. Chavez knows it only too well.

Three years into Venezuela's rural land redistribution programme, we learn that they've begun turning to urban concerns.

The mayor of Venezuela's capital Caracas says he plans to expropriate two exclusive golf courses and use the land for homes for the city's poor.

Mayor Juan Barreto has said playing golf on lavish courses within sight of the city's slums is "shameful".

Flying Rodent, via whom I spotted this splendid plan, says

Now, don't get me wrong here - I couldn't give a damn about the suffering poor of Venezuelan slums, but I am deeply enthusiastic about anything that annoys golfers.

If, like me, you are rendered apopleptic by the sight of Pringle jumpers, now is our time. If ever a sub-group of society merited dehumanisation, persecution and the deprivation of their assets, it's golfers.

Whilst I agree with the point that the hardline social exclusion of golfers is long overdue, I also see some genuine benefit besides the glory of vengeance. Golf is not only a good walk spoiled, it's also a good windfarm displaced.

So many wind farms, such as Lewis, Cefn Croes and Romney Marsh, are being sited on ecologically precious land.

Where else do we have lots of coastal land doing no good for anyone? Fucking golf courses. Turbine the fucking lot I say.

Richard Branson might want to see the motorways grassed over, but I say we should go further and see the grass of St Andrews and Royal Bastard Birkdale windmilled over.

Given that the present users have not only a disproportionately large rate of car ownership, but these will likely be big gas guzzlers, it's about time they paid something back. By force if necessary, ya Noddy Holder trouser thieving bastards.

Jack Nicklaus on Top of The Pops


Anonymous said...

Hi there - I know this is completely unrelated, but I was wondering if you could help out a random group of strangers. I browsed around for an email address but found none, so I'm going to go for broke over here.

A while ago you put up a post on your other blog covering a duo called Intaferon. Funnily enough, one of the guys on the cover of the album is our Philosophy teacher, Simon Gillham. He also happens to be leaving our college tomorrow to teach Philosophy at Sussex University. Our class is going to miss him, because, quite frankly, we think he's awesome. We were wondering if you might be able to host the Intaferon MP3s for a very brief period (preferably before tomorrow, his last day) so that we can stick them on a compilation for the geezer. You can contact us directly on jimiphoenix at gmail dot com

Any help would be much appreciated!
Class FSH-667 (Bexhill College)

merrick said...

Hi there Bexhillers, sorry not to have responded in time, life's gone a bit fuckin nuts of late.

Hilarious to hear Simon Gillham's a philosophy teacher! Nearly as mad as Jim Lea out of Slade being a psychotherapist these days (which Stuart Maconie likened to coming back in 20 years time and finding Liam Gallagher is Chancellor of The Excehquer).

Sorry I couldn't sort you out in time - a bit more notice and it could've been done. Also, the Intaferon stuff turns up on ebay all the time, or online record dealer databases like Netsounds or Gemm would be bound to have them (tho those latter ones can be a bit pricey).