Well yes a few more tories but still a major slog to give them any hope of getting in next time.
And a few bright lights. Kilroy barely kept his deposit (although he polled more than the guy standing in the same constituency for Church of The Militant Elvis. Shame, that).
Here in Leeds Central Nazi scumpig Mark Collett lost his deposit.
Socrates had a fourfold increase on last time, getting 500 votes in Leeds East (but sadly still losing his deposit).
In the one piece of joy at a Tory victory, in Newbury the LibDems' David Rendel - the pro-road fuckhead and personal champion of the Newbury Bypass - lost his seat. Ahahahahahahahahaha!
Yes yes, I know the Tory would probably have been just as pro-road. But a) at least he wouldn't have pretended to be the friend of the environment the LibDems so falsely claim themselves to be, and b) it's personal about Newbury.
I met Rendel there. He said it wasn't as bad as we said cos it wasn't really a new road as it would be designated the same number, A34, as the existing road through Newbury. I pointed at the woods behind us and said 'you want those trees cut down and tarmac laid. I call that a new road.' As obvious and simple as it was, that argument stumped him. Any political misfortune that befalls him is fuel for a fire of glee for me to skip around.
This afternoon, Lord Falconer spoke for Labour about what the results mean nationally. 'The electorate have sent the clearest possible message that from now on the government must respond to people's priorities'.
Er, 'from now on'?
What was supposed to be the purpose of previous elections?
Clearly to them, after 18 years of the Tories and the two Blair landslides, elections were nothing to do with the will of the poeple, they were about getting your cross on a bit of paper before running off for five years to do whatever the fuck they want.
Hearing people like Howard, Redwood and Dorrell get taken seriously has been chilling. These are the people who brought us the Poll Tax - which, according to Howard answering questions about the Council Tax during this election campaign, was a good idea. This is Stephen Dorrell, the man who privatised the railways before coincidentally getting a £100,000 a year part time directorship with Stagecoach, owners of South West Trains.
SWT were the people so well equipped to run a train company that they sacked a large proportion of the drivers (less wage bills, more money for shareholders). Then they had to cancel loads of services because of a shortage of drivers ('Oh, so that's why we employed them then, now I see').
So, as Howard himself says he's too old for this game, the baton will be passed to a new generation who've no experience of government, no specific atrocities to pin on them personally. But, in the absence of the hoped-for third Tory electoral meltdown last night, the Thatcherite vision will endure.
Michael Howard has said he'll quit as leader of the Tories. 'Mr Howard said he would stay as leader until the party had the opportunity to consider whether it wanted to change the rules for electing a successor. '
Translated; 'oh for fuck's sake, we go and instate the most democratic electoral system for choosing a party leader and what do the membership do? Kick out the charismatic guys and go for one twitchy right armed slaphead after another.
Hello, you bunch of decrepit bigoted buggers, you think we'll ever get elected like that? We don't care if it's what you want, we don't care what we have to say, we want power back'.