The internet is, as we are all somehow aware of without checking, full of porn. Not just a little porn but fuckloads of it. And not just standard porn, but really weird shit like would never have occurred to you if it wasn't for someone from Iowa with a digital camera on a tripod in their spare room.
So, presuming there is all that specialist stuff out there, just how weird does it get?
As an experiment that varies the format of Googlewhacking, try putting double quotes round any noun you can think of followed by the word porn, give it to Google and see what you're given in return.
There seems to be no noun left unporned.
There is, as perusers of the Bristling Badger daft quicklinks already know, a shudder-inducing clown porn site.
Brilliantly, "furniture porn" brings up a hilarious site called furnitureporn.com that does exactly what it says on the tin. The whole site's a corker, but the furniture porn movie is especially funny.
"Penguin porn" has 829 results.
"Mussolini porn" gives 1,460
"Sand porn" gives 9,840.
"Avocado porn" brings up 10 results.
"Bacteria porn", 429.
Even "cornflake porn" has a result.
This could be a new form of top trumps, see who can guess the porn with least results. Or maybe, as a dispute settling decision maker like paper-scissors-stone, people could use 'who can guess the noun with the least results', or 'who can most accurately guess the number of results for a given noun'.
(Incidentally, "paper porn" gives 151 results, "scissors porn" 231 and "stone porn" a mighty 4,510)
Today's anti-anti-immigration rant
4 months ago